Laughter and Humor

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Comment by Ana Jachimowicz on December 1, 2009 at 12:56pm

Things are slow in Heaven one day, so Moses suggests to Jesus that they go down to Earth and play a round of golf; Jesus agrees.

On the first hole, there's a long fairway with a water hazard before the green. Standing at the championship tee, Moses points to the novice tees and says "Jesus, I think we should tee off from up there. I don't think we can make it over the water from here."

Jesus replies, "I've seen Arnold Palmer make his shot from here many times, and if Arnold Palmer can do it, so can I."

Jesus puts his ball down and drives it toward the green. It sails up over the fairway, out over the water, then SPLASH, it falls in the water. Moses walks out, parts the water, retrieves Jesus' ball, and brings it back.

"Jesus," Moses says, "I really think we should tee off from up there. I don't think we can make it over the water from here."

Jesus insists, "I've seen Arnold Palmer make his shot from here many times, and if Arnold Palmer can do it, so can I."

Jesus agaiin puts his ball down and drives it toward the green. It sails up over the fairway, out over the water, then SPLASH, it falls in the water. Moses walks out, parts the water, retrieves the ball, and brings it back.

"Jesus," Moses says, "I really don't think we can make it over the water from here. If you shoot from back here again and your ball goes in the water, I'm not going to get it."

Jesus again explains to Moses, "I've seen Arnold Palmer make his shot from here many times, and if Arnold Palmer can do it, so can I."

Jesus again puts his ball down and drives it toward the green. It sails up over the fairway, out over the water, then SPLASH, it falls in the water. Moses looks at Jesus and stands at the tee, with no intention of retrieving Jesus' ball. Jesus figures he'll have to retrieve his own ball, so he walks down the fairway to the water hazard, and proceeds to walk on the water out to the point where his ball fell in.

Moses is still back at the tee when a foursome comes through and sees Jesus walking on water. "Holy mackerel!", one of them says, "Does that guy think he's Jesus?"

"No", Moses answers, "unfortunately he thinks he's Arnold Palmer."

Comment by Mary Ellen Latela on November 30, 2009 at 9:29am

I was missing laughter in my days, but I found a spot ... my friend and I joined a knitting group of women of various ages, backgrounds, etc., and the sense of community is so wonderful that we ride home laughing. Being with people I like makes me happy, and if we laugh, it's even better!

Comment by Sara Damewood on November 29, 2009 at 1:06pm

Shared at a UU gathering recently:

ALL THINGS DULL AND UGLY

(Sung to the Anglican hymn "All Things Bright and Beautiful".)

Artist: Monty Python
Album: Monty Python's Contractual Obligation Album
All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.
Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid--
Who made the spikey urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

Amen.

(I said "so true," but the original version is equally true!)

Comment by Bill Gordon on November 29, 2009 at 9:59am

Hey George, thanks for the chuckle!

Comment by Sara Damewood on November 28, 2009 at 2:53pm

LOL, George! Thanks for sharing.

Comment by George Polley on November 27, 2009 at 7:01am

Chuckles from a book I am working on titled "The Hypothecary Shop: The Wit and Wisdom of W. D. Polley".

"No one is listening until you fart."

"When I told the rainbow what its colors meant, it laughed."

Because he had worked on farms during his long life, he said he preferred drinking canned milk. When asked why, he had this to say: “Canned milk is the best. No tits to pull, no hay to haul, no buckets to wash, no shit to pitch. Just poke a hole in the son-of-a-bitch and drink!”

Yes

Comment by Bill Gordon on November 27, 2009 at 6:02am

OK, I am ready for a chuckle... Anybody know a good one?

Comment by Helen Shultz-Kamadulski on October 28, 2009 at 5:35am

Bill -

That was both a lovely description and a chuckle-worthy one. The Gods were in cahoots with you that day. How nice was that? Thanks for sharing.

Comment by Derek Chamberlain on October 27, 2009 at 12:09pm

Beautiful story Bill. Joy is such a sweet emotion, and laughter such sweet medicine. Thankyou for sharing. And thank you George for thinking to start this discussion group. Best to you both on this cold autumn morning.
:)

Comment by George Polley on October 27, 2009 at 6:31am

Bill, that is such a wonderful little story...so full of light. Thanks for giving me a smile...and a couple of tears of joy...on this early morning in Sapporo.

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