Mysticism

[Timothy Mantooth, Ph.D.]

Perhaps it is the never ending rebel inside that prevented me from fully complying to one group's defined beliefs or dogma. And though associated with many social, political, and religious groups over the years, I never seemed to truly fit in. Even now, while I commend and celebrate the teachings of Christ, I am no longer comfortable with the political and religious implications associated with wearing the label "Christian."

In my active alcoholism, I grew embittered towards the concept of divinity and began calling myself a deist, one who believes God created the world but did not hang around to give a damn and help out afterwards. In beginning a new recovery journey, I was admonished to believe in a "God of my own understanding," a concept blasphemous and antithetical to what I had always thought.

Reason, in my former way of thinking, was an enemy prohibitory of independent thought or permitted only as a means for expanding on truth, based exclusively on prescribed teachings from the Judeo-Christian Bible as the infallible word of God, irrespective of its numerous contradictions, blatant subservience of women, not to mention penchant for racism, genocide, homophobia, and war.

Upon contemplating the "God of my understanding," I discovered new insights leading me to question all I formerly held as absolute. For example, I once taught of a god who judges anyone who disagrees, plays favorites with chosen groups, and issues unreasonable demands no one can hope to attain, but instead, discovered a Universe filled with peace, love, and mystic beauty.

Mystic. Now there is an interesting word. One reserved for saints and sages from days of old. Another antiquated label...but maybe not.

Definitions vary:

"Inspiring a sense of mystery and wonder."
"Immediate consciousness of the transcendent or ultimate reality of God."
"Belief in a Union with Divine nature."

Mysticism is a path, then, that allows, even encourages, creative and expressive spirituality. And if religion is the "opiate of the masses," spirituality is salve for the individual soul, encouraging individual contemplation in thought and transcendent union with spirit or God. Best of all, mysticism is fluid and evolving based on individual experience and understanding, not a fixed system demanding rigid adherence under the threat of eternal condemnation.

My shift in consciousness has been profound, though heretical in the eyes of some. And yet, presence and communion with God, Source, Energy, etc. has never been greater. Mornings (after coffee!) begin with meditations, affirmative prayers, and readings from multiple texts, at times including the Bible. Evenings conclude with breathing exercises and contemplative meditation, amidst a solitary candle light. Interspersed throughout the week are 12-step meetings, spirituality groups, yoga, and some Tia chi.

Community is still important for support and camaraderie but not in the traditional sense of attending religious services. Actually, the spiritual community I attend only has several key tenants all of which involve loving unconditionally, the practice of personal empowerment, and honoring all truth, the very essence of the mystic path.

Mystic, hmmm. Maybe that's a label for which I can identify.

[Mary Plaster, M.A.]

Thank you, Mary

[George Polley]

One of the things I was most aware of early in my recovery was that my understanding of "God" was limited, and my understanding of "higher power" was Ed Anderson, my treatment counselor who led me step-by-step-by-step through the weeds and woods to (somewhat) solid ground.

Everything since has been a long, uphill journey that I wouldn't trade for anything as I've learned to connect with myself, my family, my children and the wonderful woman named Aiko with whom I've been married for nearly 30 years.

About three years ago an acquaintance recommended a book that I've mined time and again. It's One Breath at a Time: Buddhism and the Twelve Steps by Kevin Griffin.

During this long walk, I've also rediscovered mysticism, which I studied years ago as a seminary student, then pushed aside for other studies. To me, the "mystical path" means quietly and attentively listening to hear and understand and taking in what I informs, strengthens, deepens and broadens me.

[Timothy Mantooth, Ph.D.]

I appreciate your sharing your recovery experience. I began my journey in treatment in 1981 at age 16. I was clean until my mid-30's when life hit hard and I revisited an "old friend," leading 10 years until returning to the 12 step community this past February. It cost me dearly but I can honestly say life has never been better than today. Namaste, my friend. Look forward to additional dialogue.

[the rev Carl Freeman Reynolds]

try early mornings, as the sun comes up, before coffee..it's great...you have to allow time for the path to find you and thereby define you...before you can define the path...which you will only do by living it...not by defining it...take off your glock, again...you don't have to define it...let it define you
Carl

[Timothy Mantooth, Ph.D.]

Thank you. I will say it does give me a point of reference for this incredibly wonderful journey! Namaste!

[Lamar Davis]

In my belief one becomes a mystic when they come to the point of total surrender. An "end of the rope" type of understanding that knows without a shadow of a doubt that if some Higher Power doesn't take control then an apocolypse of the soul will continue to occur. This is the core. My total surrender takes me into the arms of Love. To know .... really know that I am loved is the greatest gift of all. Within this the Great Healing will occur for all.

[Helen Shultz-Kamadulski]

Thank you Timothy for starting this discussion and sharing more of your story. Serendipitously I am reading a book, and daily email meditations that, in my mind, blend well with the heart of this discussion.

About three years ago, shortly after moving to Washington, I bought the book: "The Spirituality of Imperfection" by Ernest Kurtz, at a used book store. I held onto to it, without reading it, til about a week, or so, ago. I'm now about a third of the way through this book and am marveling at the timing of me reading it now, three years after my purchase of it. Now is the time, apparently, for me to have affirmed in the author's writing, my own belief in the importance of telling and listening to story as a way of healing one anothers brokenness, Their is an entire section on the 12 step program of AA in the book and he references the formation and philosophy constantly throughout.

He talks in his book about the difference between magic and mystery, making magic being about willing control of whatever, and mystery being about being willing to be transformed, changed by something greater than ourselves. He also describes the difference between being one who chooses/part of being in control, as the "gods" do and are, and being chosen, like a person is anytime they share a piece of their story and are told by others how their story impacted them; how we are niether gods or beasts, but in fact, paradoxically both and; and how embracing our pain is as much a part of being spiritual as is celebrating our existence. I'm finding reading this book freeing in the reaffirmation of yet another paradox that one must truly accept oneself, many warts and all, before change/transformation is possible. I guess that's that total surrender piece Lamar mentioned.

I should probably have posted this as an "official review" for the book review group that George started, and maybe I will. But I think it fits here as well.

At any rate thanks for starting this discussion Timothy.

[Timothy Mantooth, Ph.D.]

€hank you. The book sounds incredible